Kids Say the Darndest Things ~ Home Study Edition

It's such a tired expression but, WOW, is it accurate.  No matter if it's your youngest or oldest.  Your head-strong or compliant child.  All children have a lack of filter at some point in their upbringing.

Usually that happens at the most inopportune moment!

For us, it was during our HOME STUDY!  Yeah you know, that important visit from a social worker that paves (or crushes) your way to adopting your baby??!!

In December, we were breezing our way through the checklist of our dossier.  I was determined to get this D-O-N-E in record time.  We were blessed to have a home study agency able to come to our house within the week of me calling.  Even during the busy Christmas season.  I was stoked!

The visit was going rather smoothly - even if he, Dr. K, arrived an hour and a half late to our house.  Right at dinner time.  No biggie!  I had my famous oven roast meal (thanks mother-in-law for that recipe!) already cooking and making the house smell AWESOME. 

Isabel was on her -usual- best and helpful behavior.  Jack was even participating in the put-your-best-foot-forward atmosphere.  But most surprisingly, Cole was on top of his game.

Cole is our mixed-bag kind of kid.  We can but heads and then he wants to crawl in your lap to snuggle a moment later.  He'll NEVER STOP TALKING at home but then barely says two words in public sometimes.  At times I think he's more fickle than a teenage girl.  God love him!

As the 4-hour evening was coming to an end, I had my focus on wrangling dressing Jack into his pj's.  The older two were coming into the living room and bidding farewell to our guest.  I was quite impressed with their maturity.  You can imagine that I was FLOORED when Cole sat down beside Dr. K and said, "I want to tell you a funny story".

Sounded innocent enough.

I continued dressing my wiggle worm and half-listening to this 'funny' story.  I hear a part about "our babysitter was here".

OK - not too bad.  Everyone gets a babysitter.  Right?

Tune out a bit to get the last few snaps done on the pj's.

Then I hear, "And mommy turned around and sees Jack with a big knife in his teeth!"

WHAT?!

I jerked my head around, just in time to see Stephen come flying around the corner.  Apparently, he had been over-hearing this conversation too.  I believe you could have heard that proverbial pin drop at that moment... and then all I could do was laugh.  Because laughing was better than crying!

Seriously!  Out of ALL of the Jack stories -the many, MANY Jack stories- he chooses this one.

Oh, my sweet Cole.

So the story goes...
One night I was standing in the kitchen, touching base with the babysitter before I left (bed times, phone numbers etc).  I kept hearing this clicking noise.  I turned around to find Jack walking towards me with a foot-long bread knife in his teeth - like a pirate.  He was running it back and forth - hence the clicking noise.  THANK GOD he was fine and didn't even have a scratch on him. Apparently, getting into drawers was his brand new trick.  He could not reach them previously.

Needless to say, we promptly took our dear Dr. K to the kitchen and showed him where Stephen had installed not one, but TWO safety latches on said drawer.

Two.  Because you KNOW Jack would find someway, somehow, to get around one obstacle!

Side note:  Do you know how many nails I have broken on this drawer?  I guess the 2 lock rule works on me too.

Anyway.

I was so thankful that the social worker just laughed too and then was VERY gracious to Cole... he explained to him why his mother and father turned pale and wished for the earth to swallow them at the end of his 'funny' story.  That mommy and daddy would like to impress Dr. K with our amazing parenting abilities... and that a 2 year old with a knife is not model-parenting.

Cole just smiled, bid everyone a good night, and went to bed.  Totally unaware.

Yes.  NOW I can laugh about this.