Jack on The People of Walmart

Ok, he wasn't really on it - that I know of - but he certainly could have been!

For those of you that don't know us personally, we have a very active 2 year old -Jack- that is just dying to teach his new brother TONS of tricks.  We keep on saying that he and Sam will be best buds but, truth be told, I think they will be partners in crime around our household.  He is such a joy and so very funny but Jack also has a healthy dose of stubbornness.  I blame his father's side.  And maybe my dad.

This strong will tends to rear its ugly head around the times that he is most tired.  Now, this is something that he really DID completely get from his father.  I tend to come out with all kinds of silly inappropriateness and uncontrolled giggling when I'm tired.  Anyway.

Recently, Jack and I were on our way to Orlando to join the rest of our family that was camping there for the weekend.  Stephen and I have chosen to just enjoy day trips and not take Jack camping overnight yet.  Something about the hours of total darkness and Jack, in the wild (the wild, dark AND Jack!) just has us scared.  It's a combination made in hell, really.

I needed to stop by Walmart before I jumped on the highway for our hour drive.  Jack had already snuggled into his car seat and was on the verge of sleep when I scooped him up to go into the store to make a return and gather 3 items. This did not make my over-tired two year old thrilled and he began his protest as I tried to put him into the cart.  He was like one of those dogs that you see putting their paws on each side of the door opening and not allowing themselves to be put through the opening.  Fine.  I carried him to our first stop, the customer service, to return something.

As I was trying to wrangle my little howler monkey, all of the people in our vicinity were giving each other 'the look'.  You know.  The look of either 'that poor mom and crazy kid' or 'my ears! why me? why now?'.  I must say, I think this employee processed my return in record time!  Right as we were about to leave the customer service area, a man in his 80s looked at Jack and said 'STOP' in this deep voice.  Thanks man... but not helping me at this point.

I finally plopped got him into the cart as we were walking away to shop for the three items that I had to grab.  He continued to let every person in Walmart know that he was not a happy camper.  And now, with the freedom of sitting in the basket of the cart, he was able to act on his feelings.

How you ask?

As I am walking to the bakery, I see a shoe go flying out of the cart.  I quickly grab it, put it in my purse, and continue walking at warp-speed.

Onto the next item on my list... Lord help me, it was on the complete opposite side of the store.  While I'm speed walking -and not making eye contact with other customers- I continued to collect another shoe.  Then socks.  Lo and behold, I had to bring my focus back to this screaming banshee, that resembled my child, when I saw his pants go flying.

Why must Walmart be a mile long?  Please, sweet Jesus, come and save me now.

By the time that we arrived at the cashier (who probably heard us coming LONG before she saw us) we were quite the sight...

I was a sweaty mess and had shoes, socks, & pants hanging out of my purse.  And Jack, oh my sweet little boy, had wiggled his onesie top off of his shoulders, down his arms and tummy, and was sporting it at his waist.  He was going for the bare-tummy, crazed toddler look.

Once he was back into his car seat, Jack was sound asleep before we even hit the highway.  Thankfully he had a nice, refreshing nap and was back to my happy boy again.  We had a lot of fun hiking and biking in the great outdoors that day!

With him being our third child, I am grateful that this has been our first public display of crazy.

So let me know if you see a little half-dressed toddler on the People of Walmart website!